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Testimonials about Jay Earley's IFS work Jay, I deeply
appreciate you for your vision and creating this class for healing. It
is the ultimate gift one can give to self and another. And, what you
have taught me – the skills and tools I have learned from you
- have
served me so well. The quality of my life now is beyond anything I
could have imagined in being open, loving and compassionate. I do
believe that what I have applied in IFS attracted this magnificent man
into my life, whom I have known for three years as a friend.
Now we are life partners. I have worked on myself for many years
in a variety of settings but never have I gotten so far so quickly as I
did in a recent IFS workshop led by Jay Earley. I immediately sensed Jay's
compassion, respect, patience, persistence, and sensitivity to what was
going on inside me and the others. Building trust, which usually takes
weeks, was instantaneous for me. As a result, I made a major breakthrough.
I have been able to cry for others but never for my own pain, but in
minutes, my tears were a torrent, and I could finally feel that old pain
and let go of it. I would recommend Jay without hesitation to anyone
searching for healing or wholeness. And thanks for contributing so much
to helping heal wounds I thought would always be
there because they always were. Wow! What a sea change. And when I worked,
how well you listened and knew just what to say at all the right times.
Patient and with a gentle light touch. Present and able to really track and
support each of us. You made the teaching of the material flow organically
and effortlessly. And what a wonderful support the IFS work is for anyone
who wants to work with painful and avoided parts. For this and the warm
supportive group we had, my wonderful partners, and many other details too
many to mention, I am grateful. I am a trained IFS therapist, and I was so
impressed with how Jay presented the model and worked with each individual. I
have seen many people use IFS in groups and Jay is on a par with the top IFS
trainers. I feel this deep sense of safety and
trusting of you in this class. You seem skilled in every aspect
of it. You're very sensitive to us and you respect everybody's
opinions. You're also very thoughtful and deliberate in everything
you do in the class. It was an excellent class. I liked the way you had us all
participate in the first exercise, and the way you
brought all our voices into the call via the check-in. Having weekly
homework was helpful for getting me to practice on my own. I was also glad
of the chances to practice during class time. I appreciate the warmth and
kindness I experienced from you when I was working in the class. To understand IFS and have a model
that I can follow has allowed me to disidentify from the parts of me
that are reactive so I can look at them and understand them
better. Seeing how some parts, though seemingly difficult
(like anger,
hatred or resentment), are well intended has created more compassion
toward those parts of myself which makes it easier to work with them. I
seem to have developed a facility for IFS. For me its a
matter being interested in my parts or in someone else’s parts. When
I'm doing IFS, I don't sit in front of the instructions. The questions
come naturally. When I have a reaction, simply being able to understand
that this is a part of me......not all of me, allows me to work
differently with that part, see it differently. I don’t feel so
identified with the feelings, so taken over by them. And the same is
true with my partner. When I see that his intense feelings are a part of
him, I have more space to be with his feelings. This first class has
been endlessly useful. When I feel that I'm not in Self,
the language of asking “What part am I blended with?” has been a pivot
point for me. I can get curious. I may not know what part it is, but the
curiosity helps me to look. Just the curiosity brings about more Self. I
can begin to inquire. It seems like a structure for inquiry. I don’t
feel very adept yet at the steps, but thankfully my partner is [who also
took the class]. She helps me get some purchase on these parts that I
get blended with that block Self. I also have
more compassion for other people without trying. More often I have space
about what is going on. Over the holidays, I had a challenging time
being with my father after he had a stroke. I really appreciated some
equanimity I had in the middle of it. I was able to receive support that
people were giving me that I hadn’t been able to do before. A powerful experience! Jay led me through guided
meditation and helped me connect with my authentic Self. He is sensitive
to client safety and effective in helping us do deep work. The thing that has struck me about
IFS the most is how simple it is to ask yourself about being in Self. Am
I curious? compassionate? open? And if I ask those three questions, it’s
just such a quick acid test about whether I'm in Self or not. The
emphasis and understanding of protectors has changed my worldview in a
certain way. I never was comfortable seeing some parts as critics.
Talking about them as protectors is perfect. And I’m aware of just how
powerful protectors are, and how many people spend lots of time trying
to ferret out exiles, and in fact, there’s no chance of doing that until
they deal with the protectors. The way of talking about parts in IFS is
somehow different from other systems, and it has changed the way I organize my
understanding of people. I’m grateful to have learned about this work. Jay’s
presentation of the basic concepts made it easy to understand. His masterful
facilitation made it possible to have a profound experience of the work. I was
surprised at how quickly I got in touch with a major block to my empowerment.
Jay’s compassionate presence created a safe space to explore it. I recently attended a IFS workshop with Jay
Earley. I liked very much the idea of including all of myself, even the so
called unacceptable parts, into the equation of who I am. In my work with Jay, I
experienced a warming toward and acceptance of a rageful part of myself that
upon first contact I had regarded with disdain. I left the work feeling bigger,
warmer and more whole than when I came. I found Jay to be intelligent,
sensitive, competent, and patient in staying with me and helping me get to
myself. |